A Daynight of Fear, Doubt & Madness: Perfect, Clarifying & Enlightened

START AT THE BOTTOM!

P.S.: Zie ook de compound, accumulating, distancing and harmonizing ‘lijn’ van de gitaar solos en de haalbaarheid daarvan; daarin m.b.t. numbness, afleiding, verleiding, conducitivity, alternation of consciousness, distraction of consciousness and rationality, exaltment and ultimate relatability.

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G O I N G U N D E R Vocals


Note: To be honest, I don’t actually believe or am certain that my grandparents and my mother are still alive, although I don’t exclude the possibility that they somehow were able to play a massive trick on me. I do hope so, that at one miraculous, probably emotionally very loaded point in time and space I encounter them in some sort of syncronistiscal, natural or schemed way, seeing them in some sort of renewed rejevunated form, or not, sanely laughing at my youthful ignorance and their succeeding in their scheme to somehow reunite in this lifetime.

I do realize how farfetched that is, and how deluded or ‘goedgeloving’ that may sound.

Besides that, I do find solace, smiles and wonder in the fact that I hear all three of their presence, more specifically their vocal textures and grandiosity, in listening to my own recordings at times, both during mixing and in retrospect. Going under in a sense also was a kind of vengeful, heroïc, nihilisitic, desperate, heard headed, omnibelevolent attempt to go under everything, get to the bottom of it, the music scene at that point, including its density, saturatedness and some of my most revered and the most famous aritsts and song writers at that time and in my crew of belonging, which included Tame Impala, Abel Tesfaye, Alex Turner, Anthony Kiedis, Kanye, Justin Bieber, Lamâr, .. etc.


I guess partly to be like them; rich or famous, partly to find absolution and answers to the reason of my mothers’ dead, which was, or at this point seems, a tragic, brutal, maybe needed, accident, incident or act of lethal sacrifice with me at the core somehow, and at times of the burden being too big I had to shift the blame, which I at times did by blaming, suspecting and pinpointing them, those artists, perhaps out of despair, perhaps out of truth, as the ‘co-cause’ of my mothers’ death, sacrifice or surrender, as they were blasting their ‘supreme’ songs all over our radios in their ‘Universal Language’ to a point where it left us Belgians, or Belgian musicians, nearly chancelessly in a position of eternal, fated and doomed inferiority when it came to income, pride and relational equality, balance and chancefulness.

American media, authority and music is everywhere, with their bigger incomes. Almost inescapable, supermarkets, walking past restaurants, in the gym, basically everywhere besides inside. Maybe where they wanted us to be and remain. I was fed up with it.

I remember how when my girlfriend or fiancé at the time was listening to Kendrick and how that obviously triggered me and destablized our relationship. Which I guess inspires me to write a final page about ‘Going Under’, in this digital age where which I will do now and upload it below.

Now please allow me to explain how I believe I rejuvenatingly incepted that ameliorizing fake death of my own family without my awareness. We rockstars, or rock people, or fools, whatever you call us at this point, work with people, metal, self-incepted forgetfulness, harmony, frequency, and thus energy, mass, acceleration, life, space and time.

For example mattalugry, the process of extracting valuable metals, or in this case people, from their natural mineral ores and refining them into a pure, (more valuable or) usable form. This often involves crushing, roasting, and smelting (ourselves, the metal or them).

Also, in Alchemy we traditionally find, that, alchemists pursued three central, mythical achievements:

Transmutation of metals: Converting base metals like lead or copper into noble metals like gold or silver.

The Philosopher's Stone: Creating a legendary substance essential for transmutation and believed to grant universal knowledge.

The Elixir of Life: A universal medicine or potion capable of curing all diseases and indefinitely prolonging human life.

I believe through frequency, metal, solos, devotion, chord patterns, (post) primordial truth, omniprescent knowing and some ‘bald’ ‘absolute’ ‘obedient’ people in my family i was able to incept my suffering, delusion, folly foolishness, grandiosity, truths, highest potential, of alternate reality into the consciousness of these family members, them allowing to scheme a more utopian blissful reality, whether that was in waking time or in their dreams, behind my awareness, granting me the or more suitable time, space, fatality, resources of time, space, funds, madness; anger, exaltation, ascension and devotion to ameliorize it all.

So yeah, ingeniously mad, crazy or grand, I know.

P.S.: I swear I got a random symbolic tattoo on acid in Thailand, that felt utterly important for some reason when I lived there at that time that, without my knowledge, later turned out to be a symbol a Harry Potter movie uniting three magic objects. I quote: ‘

The Deathly Hallows symbol from Harry Potter is a geometric representation of three legendary magical objects that, if united, supposedly make one the "Master of Death". It consists of triangle enclosing a circle with a vertical line running through the center.

The individual components represent:

The Elder Wand (Vertical Line): An unbeatable wand made from an elder tree.

The Cloak of Invisibility (Triangle): A perfect cloak that shields the wearer from Death itself.

The Resurrection Stone (Circle): A stone with the power to recall loved ones from the dead.

So yeah, it what I quote above would ever manifests itself as true, that’d be some, well let’s not name it at this point.

I did have friend who was a progamer, and he played a similar game that I played, only he had all skills level 99 which was insane to me at that time, apart from one skill, Necromancy, he had level 114, which they had upgraded for some reason at that time. And as I do believe in syncronstic encounters, it starts to make sense that it might actually be more true than not.

So, let’s move on to another song, Answers, or the Answers or whatever it may have been named by now. It was technically, and in terms of arrangement, probably one of the more complicated songs to finish and sound right because of the complexity of tones, vocals, lyrics, solos, textures and the overal structure, length and complexity of the song. That being said, let’s look more specifically a certain lign, lyric, which if you are familiar with the song is right before the ending solo:

& Now I finally feel enough.

Let’s look at some alternate realities that may have replaced it:

Now I feel enough. Now I finally think enough. Now I finally believe enough.
Now, in the end, I feel enough. Now I finally feel fucking nothing. Now I emphatize enough.
Now I finally don’t empathize. Now I finally inspire enough. Now I finally become enough.

Now I finally do enough.

It doesn’t really matter what It might have been, but this is where I started to hate language, for I guess multiple reasons, I guess also mainly because it can be so deceptive, especially without (mutual) context or without perspective. I wan’t to frame why in 2 others lyrics I’ve written or stumbled upon:

1. So Untouchable

Where I sing, recite: ‘We’re So Untouchable’

Untouchable can mean a myriad of things, in my opinion more than 3: untouchable as in a position where nobody can harm ‘or touch’ you because of a(n illusionary) supreme position, whether than being positive or negative while untouchable can also mean feeling so ashamed that you feel untouchable, unlovable. Then untouchable is also term to describe the lowest cast in India. But either way, so alive. It’s a paradoxcal thing about being a writer, that you wan’t to write the right thing, or clever thing, but stumble upon that fact that it’s perhaps, ultimately or not, out of your control how it will make people feel the way you intended to.


2. Tropical Diamonds

Where there is a womans’ voice adlib that says:

J’ai rien a regagner, si, je te perds or
J’ai rien a regagner, si je te père.

Si can mean either, Yes!, after a negation.
Si can also mean ‘if’

père can signify ‘to father someone’ in a poetic way while perds can also signify ‘to lose’.
So it could be, I lose you, or I father: parent you. Very different, indistinguishable by hearing.

I don’t know where this is taking me, or what point I want to make, I guess the artist in me in a way is always perfectionistic, worried or neurotic about the quality, but specifically the outcomes and influence of their art. This whole fear and paranoïa about language, lyrics and linguistics is thus definitely part of it.
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What is most important, worthy or harmful, dagenerous in rock music:

Is it the intensity with which the drums move us, in whatever direction?
Is it the meaning, beliefs and words we tend to incept in peoples’ and family’s minds?
Is it the metal of the guitar solos, percussion and hi hats that rules over people in the same way the metal of kings crown’ rule over the people, perhaps even into maddening self-isolating ways?

Maybe the question I should ask is: ‘What is most celebrative?’

Contemplation & Revelation on what Serves Me, Charlie Rulmonde, Charlie RØ, & The Ultimate Us.

*Needs.

My tracklist and me, wondering where to draw the line, including permanently opening up honestly as truly who can, may, should and must I ask, trust, help and annihilate?

Engineering, Quadriloy, Trilogy, Duology, Album Per Album, EP, Single Per Single.

Pushing it through Reels, YouTube, Meta, TikTok?
Ads, Influencer Marketing? Record Deal?
Own Label & Brand?

Surrender to the Hindu, Islam, Christian or imaginary Gods!?